Why I Hate Valentines Day

I'm just going to put it out there...I hate Valentines Day! I haven't always hated it, but it seems the older I get the more I seem to hate any holiday that makes me feel obligated to preform. For starters I think it's a bunch of commercialized crap played out between greeting card companies, florists, jewelers and chocolatiers to force men and women into publicly proclaiming their affection for their lovers with a very clear implied "or else." Not surprisingly, a woman, Esther Howland, is credited with sending the first Valentine's card in the United States. Thanks Esther! I know there's going to be women out there that will be mad as hell at me after reading this...oh well; I guess I'm not the average chic, after all, my favorite Christmas gift this past year was a new pair of hiking boots...(that I picked out for myself) People... just say NO to the craziness.

There need not even be the slightest emotion attached, nor thought behind the gift. We are told, in ads on radio and television, how a simple phone call and valid credit card is all it takes to send flowers or candy to your "special someone" and it is guaranteed to arrive in time for Valentines Day. Sure sounds easy enough...one call does it all, or does it? Presumably, the recipient can feel emotionally "validated" by getting a gift delivered via a stranger and in full view of their co-workers. Please...Give me a break! Reminds me of a very funny, sad but true story; many years ago a friend of mine ordered flowers for his wife on Valentines Day. He felt the pressure building all week long but he still waited too long to make the call... needless to say it was slim pickins in the flower world. Later that day the arrangement was delivered to her at her place of employment, there were no roses, just pretty blue carnations shaped in a horseshoe; it appeared to suggest that she was a triple crown winner of sorts! Nothing says love like a funeral arrangement for a horse!

I've surprised my husband with homemade cards with big red magic marker hearts on them for 18 years of marriage. My beef with Valentines Day is not the gifts themselves, but the high expectation and complete lack of spontaneity involved in this manufactured "holiday." May I suggest that every day be Valentine's Day, by injecting love and romance into the process, it is more memorable and more meaningful. People should show there loved ones how they feel all year long through their actions, not just one stinking day per year. It's the little acts of kindness and thoughtfulness that people remember. Try bringing your spouse a cup of coffee in bed, or taking a walk together. Go to lunch, watch a movie, share a bottle of wine...anything just don't fall into the trap! Why is saying, "I love you" somehow less valuable than sending a dozen roses that will be dead within a week? Why is there so much damn pressure for one day? How about the people without a significant other? Why do we have to rub it in even more. With all the broken-hearted people in the world, it just doesn't seem fair to glorify a 'for lovers only holiday' I've never been accused of being the 'fun police' or in this case the 'love police' but so be it...If the hiking boot fits.

So here I sit, wondering what am I supposed to do on Feb. 14? Do I stick to my principles and ignore the holiday completely and risk hurting my loved ones feelings? Should I preemptively "surprise" him with a fresh brewed cup of java in bed, a box of heart candy or maybe some boxer shorts with hearts on them days before the official holiday... satisfying my desire to remain "my own person" and make him feel like he is simply getting his Valentines Day gift early? Personally, I just want it all to go away...